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Thursday, April 28, 2011

rend my consciousness

rend my consciousness

i rend my consciousness
seeking answers to questions
i can not even formulate
so i cling to a single word
that has celebrated man’s quest
since the dawn of time
why ?

the juxtapositions we occupy
built upon the foundations of uncertainties
of understanding and belief
offers no respite
from our self damnations

we submit our souls to the winds
the winds  laden with the dust
that fills the eye
that champions the wavering
of our embraced creations of knowledge
for we are blinded
and have lost our way

and i ask
what exactly does man really know
what truth do we embody
will last forever
in the ever lasting
and just how long is everlasting any way
will i have to sit in this silence
where the voice
i long to hear speak audibly
with instruction
of which way i should walk

or should i just sit and wait
my that is a long time
and again i ask
why ?

there is a longing in my soul
and it seems that i was born with it
and it has grown ever so restless
in these days and times
and every time i am reminded of my disorientation
as i take my fixations back from the world

and the deafening stillness
of that place where nothing moves
or soothes
nor fills the deep grooves
life has cut into my heart
is saddening
and somewhat maddening

for it is answers i seek
of which there is no doctrine
no man made opinionated interpretive salve
that can satisfy this ache i have
to but touch that which is Holy
and perhaps Kiss the Face
of my maker
and whisper in His ear
a secret i have held within
since the days of  the Jin
has been vanquished from alternative realities

and this desire
that has possessed me in a raging longing
to right the wronging
of these jaded perspectives
allowed to exist
will not desist
until Bliss unpacks her bags and moves in
and pays the mortgage for this humble abode
called me
and provides the deed indeed
that the seeds of my thoughts,
my dreams
and my aspirations
for goodness
can be planted in the garden out back
with no thought
nor concerns
nor worries
of being possessed
or repossessed again
by illusion

and i will rest my mind upon this hope
and each day as we cast them to the winds
that they may be fulfilled
we will cope
with the nonsense
that which is allowed by the collective
of energy not employed

and though annoyed
with the whole
i do know it is me
the ‘i’ in me
that must do my part
and examine the finite nuances
of my own contributions
as i . . .

rend my consciousness

© 27 April 2011 : William S. Peters, Sr.

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