Ther Vine Keeper

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Wednesday, February 2, 2011

right here with me . . .

right here with me . . .

i have been dreaming of you for eons
my desires to be  . . .
with you
or near you
in your life
as you have been in mine
and these thoughts of you consumes me
beyond my ability to explain

many times there has been a pain
here in the recesses of my heart
and my soul
and i have forever wondered why
God would punish me so
i don’t know

i have asked so many times
why ?
why did i have to suffer this life
again without you

i have thus deluded myself
as i embraced the illusions
that i may find some solace

i came to believe that some one else
could fulfill this need
to no reasonable avail
for my soul continually aches
and ails for you still

some may term this thing i have for you as love
but there is a greater truth
i have come to realize
that it is not the type of love of man
that can calm this beast
that is raving and raging within my very essence
in your absence

i do remember vaguely in thought
of our holy union
when we communed as one
it seems like an eternity ago
for over many life times i have sought
to repair this torn part of my being
and all that i see and understand
that it is you who should be
here and near
for you were
the very air that i breathed
the sunshine of my day
and the soothing moonlight
of my wishful nights
and now all i dream about is you

i pray often for clarity
and perhaps it is a certain verity
i am seeking
and i feel the promise of your arrival
peeking through the clouds of my hope
and yet there is a rope of anguish
that has bound me here
immersed in my tears
and fears
that life does not fulfill one’s desires
yet the fires rage on
in expectancy
age after age
year after year
tear after tear

my soul has cried me a River
that runs to my Ocean of wantonness
for you
and this eternal redundancy of motion
swirls me in a vortex of heart aches
as i await life to deliver you
that we may emote our love

yet it seemingly brings me no closer
to seeing your face
that i may embrace you once again
to taste of your lips
to feel your breath upon my skin
to again be mesmerized by the twinkling
and the glistening of the Stars in your eyes
and i am listening
yet still
for the footsteps of your approach
your coming

and i am summoning God
please open my eyes
release me from this nightmare
of being apart
that i may see you here again
right here
with me

right here with me . . .

(c) 28 January 2011 : William S. Peters, Sr.


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