out of that door

out of that door

i sat in the room

of my personalized containment

a place of my own design

i had decorated the walls

with all the things

i have accumulated

over the span

of my journey here

the scene was the same

every day

every night

every moment

even when i closed my eyes

i was the rote-filled bored one

for i had already

worked my way

through all the Crayolas

and all the combinations thereof

i needed change

i needed a new Coloring Book

i needed courage

to dare

so i simply rose up

walked to the door

unlocked it

opened it

and walked out

i walked across

the pretty vicarious lawn

through the visceral Flower Beds

heading due west

through the meadow

attempting to catch the Sun

before it set

i was seeking an uninhibited expression

of who i may become

this day

this moment

here

each footstep

created a new way

a new path

but i cared not who would dare to follow

nor did i wish to return

for the memories

ancient and recent

of this and all carnations

i knew far too well

i wanted to climb out of my skin

and this shell

this box

i have built to hold and house

all that i have come to accept

as my destiny

my summation

my self

my life

my lives

as i said . . .  i was bored

as i considered my way

a new consciousness of wonder

began to come about

a dawning

and i became filled

with a penchant

to discover new sounds

new sights

new possibilities

never before considered

in my finite aspects nor perspectives of life

this all seemed so eerily familiar though

my “due West” migrated

slightly to the South

and then to the North

there were no rules

and i had no particular objectives

nor agendas

save but to learn this new dance

this dance of life

i was now engaging in

fully

as i continued forward

i found and stood witness

to explorable new horizons

which ever way i looked

or focused upon

and in my stillness

there was movement

as i became somewhat anxious

for the room i left behind

was fading

like shadows at High Noon

and i felt it all through me

the release

i was seeing my life

differently

than i have ever have before

i saw that it did not belong to me

but i belonged to it . . . LIFE

in the final striking of what once was

that resonant chord

a new indescribable music began to play

for in my submission

i found my liberation

all because

i dared the unknown

and i walked out of that door

© 22 February 2013 : william s. peters, sr.

www.iamjustbill.com