Today i lost my faith

Today i lost my faith

i look around at this world

my world

and i see suffering

yet there is hope

i see Hunger and Famine

and they tell me to just pray

i see Brothers of the same Father

killing their Divine Family Members

and they tell me to hold on to my Faith

well, today i lost my Faith

Is it my Faith that will make a change

as i get down on my Knees to pray to something unseen

and perhaps not known

i do know that there is something greater

i feel it within the core of who i am

but how, just how do i activate this power ?

this hour, this minute, right now

many will tell you that we have the power within

that we must move away from our sin

me, i just wish to awaken

from this nightmare we call life

to move away from the strife

and into a reality of permanence

laced with Joy

embraced by all

who hears this call

for change

Today i lost my faith

The old ways do not seem to work

for me

you see

there is no certainty

that the veil will be removed

that the Sail of our Ships of Hope

shall gather a wind

that takes us to that promised land

perhaps it is i who does not understand

but with all due certainty

we will all die

some day . . . some how

Today i lost my faith

i have laid down my life of old

many times before

as i examine the soul of who i am

in theses feeble rhymes

from the heart of a man

a Hued-man

and still i stand here

with my color and song

singing hymns of praise and joy

my life long

and still yet the relief i seek

may be here with me this week

but next week it comes late

it has vacated the everlasting

while the saints have been fasting

for a million years

and all the tears of us ordinary people

who have acquiesced to being the sheeple

of something perhaps still yet unknown

have i not my garden kept

even while my anguish has slept

at some time we all have wept

have not my seeds of hope been sown

Today i lost my faith

i spoke with a friend

about this very same situation

there was nothing uplifting

to that elevation with elation we sought

or have been taught

and i bought it

until now

in my vexation

Today i lost my faith

they say life is a present

but at times i must question

who wrapped this gift

for it seems

that all the goodness

can only be embodied in dreams

so as we drift once again to sleep

there is a despair type symphony

and i hear your soul weep

for what it once had

remembered

from January to December

and back again

Today i lost my faith

don’t get me wrong

it is Faith that changes the tune of this song

i hear through my doubts and my fear

and many a tear

has been shed

upon the pillow on my bed

and where is this Bridegroom of Spirit

that i must wed

if it is within

then let us bring it on my friend

why the shyness of spirit

i know you are there

for the drum beat, i hear it

i march daily

attempting to attune my “Self” with “i” Self

to some ethereal avail

and the children of Source continue to wail

the children who have embodied such things as

greed, war, child prostitution

in this convoluted institution

the children of slavery

i will behave

just pray they say

have faith in the seen and the unseen

well i am tired of being blind

i wish to leave all this shit behind

i wish to clear this vexed mind

and that of my brothers and sisters too

you know what i mean

i need to touch, taste, smell and fully sense

without recompense

this mean unseen love for me

that keeps playing this game of hide and seek

am i not being diligent

Today i lost my faith

what i do know that is without my faith

this stuff is somewhat unbearable

and we realize our fears

the same ones who have been sitting

on the other side of our consciousness

all these years

as i walk this path

taking an inventory for all i have

have had

yes i am somewhat glad and thankful

for i do hold the visions in my eyes

of something greater to come

and i recognize

that our sum

is much greater than the collective

and from one soul to another

this is not selective

nor discriminatory

for the story is not about our differences

but of our similarities

without disparity

and with an absolute clarity

we must embrace each other

without reservation

nation to nation

culture to culture

gender to gender

from abundance to nothingness

from indifference to deference

if we are to change this mess

and if this is but a test

we must pass

together

as one

to get this done

and though Today i lost my faith

i have found my Power

and that is my Love . . .

for you

Today i lost my faith

(c) 9 January 2011: William S. Peters, Sr.