as i scream

as i scream

i walk into the vast

seemingly endless Canyons

of my thoughts

and i scream

finding solace of some sort

in the reflective reverberations

these un-anointed vibrations

which bring to me

no usable return

i am seeking a reasonableness

but i am haunted

for all i hear

is this voice of my own

visiting upon me

time and time again

with a fading frequency

that rings of no validity

i scream again

God, don’t you hear me

i stand in your valley

my eyes are not completely open

i think

so that “Shadow of Death” . . .

evades me

like a leper

in a colony of nubile virgins

do i soil this ground i walk upon ?

how can that be

when i traipse through this life

as one of the dead

perhaps it is my deaf ear

that which i have turned to you

many times before

in our past relationship

may i offer my apologies

there is a putrid smell

that they tell me exists

where you have stored your fruit

and it rots

if this be true

most certainly you know i must ask

why ?

my arrogance at times become me

and you too my Father

for what am i . . .

but of your ilk ?

i came seeking a resolution

a way of reconciliations

a solution

to that which binds me

to this cyclic expression

they call life

but somehow i know this too

to be a lore foregone

by errant teachings

from those who knew you not

as well

so they resigned themselves

to tell of their surmisings

no surprisings here

for the chastisings of my life

do seem a bit

out of sort

and an incongruous

eclectic superfluous

non symbiotic quixotic

dance of the fools

as does the schools

they teach us in

is that the Sin

that we listen to them

instead of you

somehow

this i think we knew to be true

so here i am

for appearances sake

alone

no working phone

upon which i can reach you

and teach you

how to answer to my calls

which incidentally

i will be doing often

from this point on

and by the way

thank you for this little chat

and please don’t hold

my sarcastic act

against me

when i come to this

Canyon

searching for you

searching for reason

searching for me

and my voice

as i scream

© 13 October 2012 : william s. peters, sr.