autonomy

autonomy

i am autonomously connected

to a conundrum of dichotomies

where contradictions

rule the day

i am One yet many

yet all

yet none

of these things

i am discovering

that which has always been

and the absence of this sin

you would have me embrace

i long to taste

the essence

of the thought

the consciousness

which made me,

that which is without flaw

being the suspect prefect

of what i believe

i suspect that

i am more

then what you tell me i am

more than what i have told my self

i feel there is an untapped wealth

waiting in the shadows

for my smile

to lighten up my perceptions

so that all the deceptions

will flee

forever

whatever that may be

as the night silently approaches

and fatigue makes its way

into my expressions

i begin to take leave of

my skewed reason and logics

the Angels of mercy

come to me

offering the much needed respite

for i have struggled with self

all the day long

i long for the rest

yet they do not wish to let go

my own mind

rebukes me

refutes me

with reproach

and taunts me

to continue to play

upon the landscapes of possibilities

enticing me to further investigate

the same spoiled meals

i have considered

every day of my adult life

yes, i too tire

of redressing and addressing

the same redundant pathways

that offer no probabilities,

just rote filled thought

that are devoid of the things,

the reasons we men

dream of and for . . .

fruition

we all have paid the toll

the tuition

to this school of life

have we not ?

yet some aberrant aspect of life”

continues to “tax” us

with death being the end game

we have suffered

toiled

fell

got up

worked

lamented

begged and prayed

to no apparent avail

we have mended the sails

of our aspirations

and painted the bow

with new age color filled doctrines

and yet we still move

in circles

that do not evolve

or spiral upward . . .

seemingly

could it be that our rudders

need to be cast aside

have we yet weighed anchor ?

shall we become dependent

upon the way of the Seas

and its non prognostic waves

and their turbulence

hoping that it sees

much more than we ?

the Dove of our peace

is another MIA

this day

for he too wished to fly away

seeking Olive Branches

to provide a sign

for his own Soul

he too wishes to rest his

troubled wings

and gather new hopes to share

for the sake of the children

who anxiously await his return

2 by 2 in projection

with expectations

we remain dualistic

with naught but simplistic

desires

we are flooded with despairs

that loom about us

waiting for our trust in our selves

and that 'empirical' God

within us

to vaporize . . . again

but we shall not go the way

of defeat

for our feet are resistant

to take that journey

and begrudgingly tread

towards our ultimate demise

the Souls

of our inner child

knows not of such things

nay, there is another day

awaiting us

if we can but make it through

and pierce the fabric

remove the scales

rend the veil

that cloaks us from our wonder

our regality

four sovereignty

with an absoluteness

a certainty

that too can not fail

yes we are the prefects

of that which we suspect

we are God personified

and we are soon to be deified

for we are One

as soon as i open this “I”

and realize that

i am autonomously connected

to a conundrum of dichotomies

where contradictions

rule the day

but i rule my Creation

(c) 24 October 2013

www.iamjustbill.com

www.iaminnerchild.com